Neji's Tale
by greenkat92
Summary: Why was Neji late for his meeting?  You may not want to know...much luvkitty


"I had always thought that things happened for a purpose, and all things were of one source; fate. However, it seems to me that some how, my mind has been lost in something and I won't be able to retrieve it for a long time, the damage will be irreversible really, but for now, I'll enjoy it. Maybe I should start you at the beginning- stories are supposed to have beginnings, aren't they? I'm unsure how to tell this story, so I'll try some different ways- any suggestions? Hmn, all I can think of for now is this next paragraphs style, perhaps this one will work."

"Once upon a time in a not-so-far-away town, there lived a young and very powerful knight named Neji, however his strength was always brought down by the fact that he had to work together with a leprechaun named Rock Lee and a ogre called Tenten. However unworthy they were to work with him, Sir Neji could not complain because they were a team, and complaining would have them look down upon him, and nobody should ever look down upon a knight, am I right? Well, anyways, Sir Neji's squad was one day allowed a day off and Sir Neji decided that he didn't want to waste it, so he escaped from his cruel comrades (someone has to be cruel in a fairy tale!) and went to the mystical training grounds."

"The sun was hot that day, so Sir Neji had to stand under leafy tree's that were very abundant in that fair town to do his practice. After vanquishing a few hundred targets, Sir Neji grew weary of this and retreated under a tree to regain his strength, and that's when it happened."

"Ah, I do not think that the fairy tale type of storytelling would be right with this plot, perhaps something a bit more nature-y and lively would be good."

"Young elf Neji looked up, and what else did he see, but a beautiful pixie, gracing the field with her delicate and perfect presence. Neji was very shy around her, so he hid behind the tree as she did target practice with her magic- she was exquisite! Everything was so perfect, so Neji the elf decided to approach her."

" 'Oh fair pixie, I wish to call you my own!' Neji the elf said, he was very polite, even bowed and gave her a flower he had found on the other side of the tree! She didn't reply, most likely because she was so complimented that a very handsome elf, like Neji, would spend even a moment of their time staring at her perfectness. However, Neji the elf was not too disappointed! He had a plan!"

"No, no, this is too similar to the fairy-tale version! Perhaps I should try something with a bit more southern culture! Hmn, now let me see…"

"Sheriff Neji was not going to let this hot senorita out of his sight, for fear that he would loose her, so he did what any trained cowboy of the deep and wild west would do, he decided to make her jealous! Unfortunately for Sheriff Neji, he did not know any people of the feminine realm, his only partners in law were deputy Lee and the pigsty keeper, Tenten, so Sheriff Neji decided on the more feminine of the two. This one was perfect because they already wore mascara, so tossing on a dress would finish the look!"

"Although Deputy Lee didn't like the dress (it made his hips look big), he put it on any ways- because he knew that Sheriff Neji was the main honcho. So, Deputy Lee and Sheriff Neji made a huge appearance in the town villa, laughing extremely loudly and holding hands so that the beautiful Indian Princess would notice him- but she only seemed to be annoyed by the fact that the two were stealing her nacho's because they were getting hungry from laughing so loudly for so long."

"Well, that doesn't quite seem to fit it either! Maybe I should make it more current in Holly Wood, I mean, who doesn't like Holly Wood? (I will ignore the thousands of holly-wood-rejects that just raised their hands)"

"So, walking past Paris Hilton, Neji- the soap opera star- realized how cruel it was to her puppy to be around it all of the time with how spoiled she acted. 'I must liberate it!' he exclaimed, ripping her purse that held the dog away from her arms and running away. The puppy was extremely happy, but showed it by bearing it's monstrous fangs and barking, saying that it was Akamaru or something. Neji, although he understood the dog because he is a genius, decided to try to impress his co-star with the adorably terrifying puppy."

"Although his publicist, Rock Lee, advised against it, and the janitor Tenten said that dogs aren't allowed on set, Neji brought the small Chihuahua to that days rehearsal. When he showed it to the beautiful actress, she was so flabbergasted that she left, most likely to get a pen and paper for her phone number. Unfortunately for the soap opera star Neji, after a few hours his publicist and the janitor needed to have a word with him, so he was not able to wait for her to return."

"I don't think that that was a very good style. I mean it died practically the moment I mentioned Paris Hilton, so let's see, what else is there?"

"The waves crashed all about Neji, captain of the Plaque Whirl, the speediest ship in all of the Caribbean's. 'I won't let her get away!' he cried out, his extra loose white blouse sticking against him and becoming transparent because it was getting wet. He turned the ships mighty and huge steering wheel and tried to veer it back on course. This was hard of course because he…"

"Ok, to be honest, I have no clue where that one was going, I just wanted to be a pirate! Arg! Hopefully this one will work better."

" 'Ok, now listen to me, you may be a powerful wizard, the chosen one even, but that won't save you if you don't go to your DA meetings!' the hopeless wizard Rock Lee said, his broken wand hanging out of his back pocket."

" 'It's true, has your scar hurt though lately?' the abnormally long haired male witch, Tenten asks, looking at the powerful, yet young, wizard Neji's forehead. Neji shake's his head no. 'Well, any ways, go to the meeting, it's tonight, I'll see you there," the male witch says, walking off, his curly hair just almost distracting enough to keep your mind off of the thought of how big his teeth are. Glancing up, Neji the wizard saw the most beautiful witch ever. She was so beautiful, clad in complete blue, her pale skin so lovely and her magic so pure and charming."

"Oh, I love that part. Ah, but I must switch styles yet again! Let's see, the ending of the story!"

" 'Yo- 'ey babe, let's go hang out fo' five min' or so.' Street-smart Neji said, trying to impress the hot chick with his awesome bling."

"No- that's no way to end a story, I don't want to scare anyone when the guns are whipped out- so instead-"

"The mighty steed, Neji, approached the beautiful unicorn, her hair glimmering in the bright sunlight so perfectly. 'Come with me,' he said softly, looking her in the eyes with a smile that he knew was irresistible. She sighs deeply (it almost sounded depressed- but I know better!), then agrees to come along to the meeting. Lucky she was along, because the mighty steed Neji had almost forgotten the directions to where the meeting would be. When they arrived, the stable was almost completely full."

"And that, Guy-sensei, is why I've brought this exceptional beauty to our meeting with an enraged, oversized Chihuahua," Neji says, happy with how he had told the story and looking over endearingly at the one who sat beside him. Rock Lee, Tenten, and Guy-sensei all back away slowly from Neji, completely weirded out by his strange behavior. After a moment, Guy decides to clarify something.

"Uh- Neji- I love your youthful enthusiasm while you were telling that story, it was very- uh- uplifting, but," he pauses for a second looking at Neji, watching him closely. "You do now that that's Sasuke- right?"


End file.
